information

I wonder what is safe information. I get IM's from my students. Are they safe? A couple want me to joining facebook.com. It seems like a better version of myspace. I know lots of people who use both. They post and join groups and never think twice about it. Are all bets off because I teach? We use a program or network for school communication. This new version of networking has already increase student/teacher communication and email x 10. They use computers fearlessly. Is that a good thing? Is it the old school adults who are the paranoid ones? It seems that I was in on the beginning of the tech take off. I remember AOL by the hour. But am I already too old to use these new post and shares? I am more afraid of people older than me judging me that I am of the youngins' having access to my information or thoughts. It makes me wonder. Where do I fit in on this timeline?

Baby

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Fiction or Non-Fiction

I feel as though I am dying in side. My stomach hurts. I can't sleep. Why? It is hard to pin point. I am full of anxiety but it stems from mass insecurities. I dwel and feel low, get stuck in a rut, and then let my mind over take my body. No, this is not a pregnancy issue. The baby is fine and happy - safe in his warm place for now. This is defiantly a work issue. It hurts to be criticized and it is personal... Although it isn't. Funny I can tell my self it isn't personal and that I am ok but I don't believe myself. It seems sad to think that the one person I can always trust to be there for me is Me, but I don't trust that person. I am in survival mode and sad. I dread facing the world so unkind. My husband tries to help but I just can't get my brain wrapped around the idea that my world is ok and I am ok and that people don't hate me. UGH! It is frustrating. My logical sides says that all is well and not to worry but my heart hurts. When my heart hurts my stomach hurts and it seems to go down hill. When things like this have happened before I have a nice big drink. Now, I just want to cry. It just doesn't seem fair. I am doing this to my self... I wish I could stop.

Can you step in the same river twice?

Life by the very means of existence is inconsistent. Each day is a new set of situations or a new place. You are not the same person you were yesterday. Or are you? Do you change? The very chemical make up of your body changes. But the essence of you stays the same. Or does it? It is confusing but entertaining. Maybe that is why life is interesting. Although, you need to be aware of these inconsistencies or changes and then appreciate them. Trust in the fact that doing the same old thing every day would be boring with our appreciation of subtleties.

Baby update